Halloween

Lets go trick or treating tonight Kool, Wracks drawls, It s Halloween

Yeah, I have Cranks shaving cream and a carton of rotten eggs, promises Kool.

Wallbe sold me some tear gas, says Wracks, I can’t wait to try it.  We need some pretty young girls to terrorize on alls Hallow eve.

We can live on candy, says Wracks and Nate can come along.

See you at dark, screams kool, I have cherry bombs. 

Kool runs away screaming “Cherry bombs”, and he disappears up Mellowman street. 

Wracks, I don’t want the police to call me from jail like the day you and Timey were hunting deer down in the Canyon with Bows and Arrows, says Papa Wracks. 

I promise I won’t do anything radical except have a good time, says Wracks

Be home before curfew or they will run you in, says Papa Wracks.

Tonight, Cool, Wracks and Nate will ascend Bacon way and try to draw out the opposition.  Bacon way winds uphill, the incline increasing until Bacon way becomes Disenchanted Drive and Way of the Saint Inez.  Almost all the homes on Bacon way celebrate Halloween.   Some carve spooky pumpkins and set them out front with candles blowing eerily in the night breeze.  Others display lights and banners or play scary sounds through intercoms and hidden speakers.   Others just leave a huge bowl of candy out front under a light and next to a lighted jack o lantern because they are somewhere attending a Halloween party.   Kool , Wracks and Nate walk up to houses and level their shaving cream at the door of the celebrants.    When the door opens they yell “trick or treat,” level their weapons and pull their bandito masks over their faces.   The usual reply becomes a bowl of candy and the three scoop handfuls of the prizes and transfer the goods to their backpacks.   A little child dressed like an Indian walks by and Kool throws a lit cherry bomb inside his full bag of candy.   The bomb explodes with a loud wham and candy flies like shrapnel everywhere, and the little kid sits down and starts to cry.  The child’s parent starts to chase Kool but Kool outdistances the adult and hides in a bush. 

What is his name demands the distraught adult with a crying child dressed like an Indian.

His name is Barney and he lives on Mellowman’s says Nate.   Five houses up.  

You will all pay for what just happened, promises the adult.   

About half an hour later, Wracks finds Kool talking to one of the Neighborhood girls who is dressed like a Cat with a long black tail and tight leotards and a cat mask. They both smoke cigarettes and turn to look over wracks and Nate who are now nearing the top of the hill.  

Hello, I am Wracks, Happy Halloween.

The pretty little cat bats her eyelashes at him and then blinks.  

Kool, why did you blow up the kid’s bag of candy, asks Wracks

The devil made me do it says Kool.    Besides, I do not like his Dad.   

He says he is going to call the Police, says Wracks.

They cannot prove a thing, says Cool, not a thing. 

Let’s head over on Disenchanted, command Wracks. 

The three cross the street from upper Bacon and start on Disenchanted Drive.   The first house on the hill has lights on and looks open except that the owner has a huge dish of candy with a sign of “Eat at your own risk.”  The three youngsters dressed as hoodlums take handfuls of candy from the bowl and then Kool takes the bowl and empties the entire contents into his backpack.  

Yeah, says Kool.   Happy Halloween.

The house across the street situates on an alcove and lush foliage shroud the entirety of the house. Only a small entrance niche and a long living room window show the main extent of the house.  The three gangsters knock on the front door where a small iron pumpkin with a candle within flickers in an odious and ominous way.   The door slowly opens and a woman with curly hair in an evening gown greets them.  She holds a small dish with candy in front of the three and says, “Take one only.”  Wracks takes one, Nate takes two, and Kool scoops a handful off the tray.  The curly-haired woman smiles and withdraws.  Behind her sitting in the shadows is a man with a goatee and dark black beard, dressed in a suit with a black hat and black boots, almost like he was to attend a party, on a large chair that looks almost like a throne.  The shadows shroud the man’s features but his hands are long, almost feminine, with nails shaped like claws.   The door closes and the three walk off.

Nate says, that man in the chair looks just like the devil.  I can’t believe it.  What a radical costume.  I bet he wins first prize at a party.

A wrack says that man looked really evil.   His hair was black, he had claws and he dresses in a business suit on Halloween.  He must be really rich to afford a makeup artist like that.  I was ready to run in case he lunged at us and tried to grab our throats. 

Cool’s eyes turn up in his head and he screams out, “twisted,”   twisted on Halloween.   He then masticates a tootsie roll up into a wad in his mouth and spits the soft food on Nate.   Nate in disgust wipes off the sticky mess with a paper towel and glares at Cool.   “Don’t you ever make a fool of me again?”

Up a way on Disenchanted live the Pickle family and the Van horror.   The pickles live like active sociopaths and ride motorcycles out in the desert with Wracks brother.  The vans Horrors have motocross bikes too and the youngest van horror daughter has a beautiful face, nice figure and fine brown hair almost like angel vellum.  However, the van Horror beautiful woman was the subject of a supernatural horror film and no one dates her.   Wracks cannot figure out why? She looks unbelievably attractive.  Maybe if he had an income he would be able to date her although no one else does.  She looks at him and waves on this Halloween and Dike Pickle heaves a spoiled tomato and beans Wracks square on the chest.  With that initial sighting round, a hail of tomatoes, lemons and rotten eggs rain upon the three from behind the gate at the front of the house.

Retreat says Wraks, we are outnumbered.  The three turn about face and run down disenchanted Drive and then flip off their victorious adversaries from a safe distance.  In the distance Wracks sees three people with a huge slingshot muster a large water balloon.  The loader pulls back on the elastic cords holding the sling to the shot and then let’s fly.  A water balloon arcs towards the three from about one hundred yards away. 

Take Cover yells Nate.  They have artillery.  A large water balloon filled with house paint impacts and explodes ten feet away.   The three turn about face and run for their lives.  They have lost the battle of disenchanted drive and have been driven away.  Back down on Bacon way the three hunts for another gang upon which to take their revenge.   The only adversaries to be found are three pretty young girls dressed as nymphs in skin tight leotards with makeup and wigs.  Cool proceeds to inundate each of them with shaving cream and then toss firecrackers at them. A wrack sprays one of the girls who jumps away giggling.   The loud explosions of the firecrackers drive the pretty young girls away running.  Within ten minutes an adult in blue jeans runs at the three. Cool sees him first and leaps away into the bushes.  The man is Nate’s next store neighbor and he applies a headlock on Wracks and leads him away. 

Why are you attacking my daughter girlfriends he asks Wracks.

Because it is Halloween and everyone has to play pranks. Says Wracks

Where your shaving is cream, asks the man.

I must have dropped it when you put a headlock on me, explains Wracks. 

I am going to call the police and complain, says the man. Now be on your way

Go ahead says Wracks, I haven’t done anything illegal. 

Down the street, the two other cronies wait for Wracks. What happened, they asked.  An adult attacked me then let me go, says wracks.  They were looking for your Cool, but they got me instead.  Kool smiles and shoves another piece of candy in his mouth.  On Wracks watch he sees that the time is about ten thirty P.M. Cool says, I have to be home for curfew.  So do I, says Nate.  The three then shake hands and split up.  Nate walks back up Bacon way to his house.  Kool runs up Mellowman’s and disappears into his driveway and Wracks enters his house from the front.  His mother lets him in the front door and Wracks spies a snickers candy bar treat, grabs the candy, tears open the wrapper and throws it into his mouth. 

Happy Halloween, says Wracks and he exits to his bedroom where his brother lies asleep already, wrapped up like a mummy and snoring.  Wracks takes off his shoes, his pants and his shirt and slides into the small bunk bed on the wall opposite the Fonz.  Sleep rapidly overtakes him.

How was your Halloween, asks Father Wracks at the breakfast table over a cup of coffee. 

I was ambushed and pelted in an artillery barrage and then the neighbor beat me up.  

Don’t say I never told you so, says Father Wracks.  You should have stayed home and handed out candy.

I should have, could have would have, and then life wouldn’t be the way it is thinks Wracks.

Today strikes as All Souls day, the day of the dead.  This day chronicles as a day the dead walk the earth and checks up on their families.  If on all souls day, a stranger walks up to a person and tells them something unbelievably poignant or entirely strange, then they are an angel. God lets the departed circulate freely amongst the living if they do not meddle or contact anyone.   Once a soul speaks to a mortal man or woman, they must be reincarnated and relive an earthly existence.  If someone who isn’t an acquaintance relays important information to him or her on All Souls day, please listen.  As punishment, they must be reborn. Happy Halloween.