Wracks, your parents have given you to us for two weeks. They are going to Vegas to stay at the Flamingo with the rat pack, and now you are with us.
What is the rat pack asks Wracks
A bunch of rich people with a lot of time on their hands says the Scoutmaster.
When is lunch asks wracks
We will have a late lunch-dinner at four because the squad is practicing a kayak insertion at Doctors cove, and from there, they will run back with their gear to the camp. They will be timed.
No you cannot go says the Scoutmaster, you must be 18.
Can I have a candy bar asks Wracks, I brought one with me and it is in my tent.
I have to go for the insertion says the Scoutmaster. I am leaving you in the hands of my good friend. His name is Scuba. And the scoutmaster picks up his pack and leaves in a trot.
Hi Wracks, my name is scuba and today I will teach you all about it
Will I swim says Wracks?
No you will listen. The gear we cover today is very sophisticated and requires your attention.
One of the elder scouts is going under in a diving rig. We are trying to simulate repair of a ships hull after it is hit with a torpedo. He will be under for about an hour. Are you with me?
Yes says Wracks. Where is the bathroom asks Wracks.
Shit in your pants says Scuba. Do you understand soldier
Yes Sir.
Firstly, the regulators on scuba equipment are of two types, freeze open, and freeze closed.
If you choose a freeze closed respirator in a dive under thirty feet, it will freeze close and your dive is over and you race to the surface. These devices are inexpensive.
Look at it, it is small. This is the regulator knob. There, you have seen enough give it back to me. This is a freeze open regulator if you are going for a dive of over 30 feet of deeper choose this regulator. The deeper you dive the colder the water is. If you are under and the tanks start blowing air into you lungs, you have gone too deep, you ascend in stages of 15 minutes so a diver does not get the bends.
What are the bends asks Wracks
bubbles of nitrogen form in your blood and it hurts like crazy. See this, it is freeze open regulator and they are very expensive. This is my personal device. No you cannot touch it.
See the soldier on the end of the pier with a metal helmet on, We are going to supervise his dive today, this is a dry run for him and it is very serious. Don’t be childish.
Scuba steps over to a large machine run by a gasoline engine with a long black tube shrouded in metal weave that leads to the soldiers helmet. He starts the machine and the compressor chugs away with a puff puffing sound. He gives the thumbs up sign to the soldier and he jumps off the pier into the water surrounding the island. The water around an island gets deep quickly. Bubbles start popping on the surface of the water as the diver moves outward. He has to be submerged for an hour to be certified in deep water says Scuba. Watch the fucking bubbles, his life depends on it. Watch the tube, be sure it doesn’t kink. Now watch what I am going to do.
Scuba takes his pliers and kinks the steel encased tubing and the bubbles cease to rise.
See that says Scuba, he can not tell his air supply is compromised until he starts to black out. He takes his pliers off the hose and the bubbles start appearing again. If anyone approaches you with a pliers in their hand, draw your sidearm and shoot them. Your highly trained divers life depends on you. If someone approaches you station, unless they are brass, ask for identification and if not draw your sidearm and shoot them. Do you understand. Your divers life depends on none except you.
I understand says the Wracks.
While I am on the subject, If you can choose a two tank unit to scuba. When one tank is empty, switch to the other on your regulator, it is time to head home. Each tank yields about thirty minutes of under water time. Fill your own tanks with a compressor at home and be sure the intake port is nowhere near the gasoline engine exhaust system or you will get carbon monoxide poisoning. At scuba shops they are not so careful. Fill your own tanks and check the regulators for function before you dive. When you are under thirty feet avoid the urge to drop your weight belt and float to the surface and ascend in stages using your dive watch. Unless you follow strict protocol every dive you might get a stroke in the water.
It is about time to bring my boy up, I will signal him.
The bubbles drifting upwards get closer and closer together, and the diver ascends in his rig with bright brass helmet, and moves to the ladder on the pier, grabs hold to the rail and is up. When aboard. Scuba releases the fittings on his helmet and eases the appliance off his head. The diver doesn’t look any worse for wear and the first thing he says is,
How did I do?
You are good says Scuba, no hiccups. Do you think you can manage one and a half hours.
I will try says the diver.
Next time bring a bag of tools with you to stimulate planting an explosive or patching a hole.
Manana
See you tomorrow says the diver and he showers off with a clean water hose and then leaves.
That is scuba diving in a nutshell says Scuba. If you become a certified scuba diver, the navy will draft you if they can. Good divers are very hard to find. Do you understand
Yes Sir.
There, you can go and get your candy bar. I have to clean the compressor and get it ready for tomorrow. Put a shroud over the device when you finish and tie it with a cord and knot.
Dismissed.
The Wracks runs as fast as his little legs will carry him and gets a milky way candy bar hid in his sleeping bag. It tastes so good and he drinks brackish water from a hose.
I hope mom and dad are having a good time in Nevada, swimming at the Flamingo and diving off the huge tower into the deep end. Dad says they all like martinis dry and he is bringing a gallon of beefeaters gin with him. The sky is summer blue away from the haze and the ocean is deep green and grey out here on an island and Wracks lays in his two man tent and waits for the dinner bell to sound.

If Yahweh the maker exiled him to the evil one, in his service,
He would require as payment that all human beings, man and woman would find someone to love them for their lifetime.